Weeble

...however....i rang the airport just before i left, and lo and behold, my flight was delayed by another hour to 11pm...so i got to see Weeble after all. Weeble gigs are legendary, seriously. We won battle of the bands for the midlands in 2004, and the gigs are always packed and raucous and a great time, with a huge mosh pit skanking away to ska-punk tunes. junktion 7 is kinda our home venue as well, so this was a truly superb gig....so so so glad i got to see it. but the flight delays, me missing my flight back to oslo, sheffield united at home, tonys birthday....i dont know...seemed to mean something, like divine intervention maybe...anyway, got home at 3am monday morning feeling tired but happy, maybe the happiest ive been in a while. flying back to nottingham again on thursday for my and my mums birthday respective do's....so am looking forward to that immensely.

Junktion 7

Another strange coincidence was that my band (Weeble) were playing a gig sunday night, however, i was flying back before the gig so couldnt make it. got to the airport, to find a 3 hour delay on the flight, so checked in and headed back to nottingham for a few support gigs. jody's other 2 bands were playing, Yogurt Bombers final gig, and Jimmy the Squirel....ace ace bands which i love, and am mates with most of them...anyway, turns out i had to go to the airport before i got to see Weeble play (i ws going to play with them but had not been to practice in a loong loong time due to work etc...oh and living in another country, so i had to watch anyway...which i hate by the way, its like seeing your girlfriend with another man...oh dont get me started...just hate watching and not playing)

Tony's birthday

in hindsight, was a very weird weekend...and kinda made up my mind about a few things (see next months blog). i say weird as loads of things happened that were great but very infrequent, and they all happened, ie sheffield united being at home...and winning, then sunday was my mate tonys birthday meal with the Betts's

Saturday night in with the boys

Beattie!

actually managed to capture our second goal, a great penalty from James Beattie, top corner...nice. a perfect way to spend an afternoon

Beautiful Downtown Bramall Lane

aaahh..my favourite place on earth, Bramall Lane on a saturday afternoon watching Sheffield United. Managed to get a ticket for the game (thanks mum), so sat there with beer and sang and shouted ans swore my way through an afternoon of surprisingly good football. actually we won 2-0 even with 10 men....plus sheffield wednesday lost (pigs) so was a perfect day really :-)

Home

bacon sandwiches...hmmmmm spoilt only by ryan in pyjamas...

Doh!

So i get to aberdeen airport early friday morning to fly back to oslo, queued up at check in for ages, and in the new found spirit of conversationalising (new word) entries, this is how it went:
me: id like to check in please
check in girl: can i have your passport please?
me: yup
check in:...(furiously tapping on keyboard) sir, i cant find you on my list
me: oh, well im there
check in: (furiously tapping more) i cant find you on the flight...sharon, can you help me (maybe she wasnt called sharon...artistic license again)
me: im definately on this flight
check in girls (plural): are you sure sir?
me: yes, i have my printed itinery here, it says, 'confirmed, 9.40am flight aberdeen to oslo, 17th april)
check in: sir...its the 18th today
me: (trying to get bags off the scales and away as soon as my legs could carry me)

had actually missed my flight by a whole day! pillock. and would also explain why my 'hotel' had tried to kick me out of the hotel a day earlier...hmmm...

so left with few options (and having to now fund my return on my own), the next flight to oslo was in 5 hours and was £380...however, i did manage to find a flight direct from aberdeen to nottingham for £120 (see appendix 1, photo of aeroplane)...so i jumped on that, and decided to have an impromptu weekend home...and was very very exciteda bout that as well...queue montage of great weekend at home...

Aberdeen

spent a week in aberdeen with work, memorable for the fact that my 'hotel' was actually a room above the roughest pub in the whole of aberdeen, which had an indian restaurant attached to it...anyway, it was the annual 'not raining or blowing a typhoon day' so went for a lovely walk on the beach...and the award for most boring blog entry goes to....

$%^&£*&$'s!!!!

So imagine the scanario if you will...after arriving back from my trip, i blearily wake on a monday morning, walk outside to go to work...my car has completely vanished, like 'poof' mid-air, no idea. so i rack my still half asleep brain, and come up with a few possibilities:
1. i actually drove to the airport and took the train back in a state of jetlagged confusion...no, i definately remember getting the train to the airport
2. its been stolen...hmmm, inconvenient but opnly a lease car...although it did have my sheffield united sticker in the back..grrr to that
3. i parked it around the corner....no, 10 mins of wandering the block told me otherwise
4. it has been reposessed due to an admin error...aha! that will be it...so i called the car people, and managed to find then only norwegian who doesnt speak english (well, apart from the famous hairdresser incident when i first arrived...and we all know how that turned out...well you dont...but sounds better if i say you do)

conversation went as such...
me: erm this is mr parkes, i am a long term customer of yours
car people: hei hei (i forget if they actually said that, but its about one of four norwegian words that i know so i thought id show off)
me: eeeeerrrrrmmmm....do you have my car?
car people: nei (number 2 of 4) dont you have it?
me: erm not exactly
car people: where is it?
me: erm i dont know
car people: oh
me: oh
insert pregnant pause...
car people: maybe it was towed...heres their number xxxxxxx
me: tusen takk (thank you) (3 of 4)..in fact i didnt even say that at all...im lying

so, i phoned the traffic gestapo/police (i hate these people, ive paid them £200 in ridiculious charges this year)

me: erm...do you have my car?
gestapo: ya vee have your car (imagine fake world war 2 crummy film accent...again a lie...artistic licence)
me: erm why do you have my car?
gestapo: (ill stop the accent) it was parked illegally
me: no it wasnt, it was parked in a legal parking spot where i always park it, outside my house
gestapo: well you see, on wednesday we put up a temporary no parking sign on your road, your car was still there on thursday so we towed it
me: but i was away on business all week
gestapo: well, you need to check your car every day
me: but i was away all week!
gestapo: its the rule
me: (sounding like a petulant 4 year old child) but thats not fair!!
gestapo: its the rule
me: but its not fair! etc etc..
gestapo: silence (but thinking 'its the rule;...i could tell)
me: how much to get my car back?
gestapo: £300
me: £300!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! so let me get this straight, i park my car legally, go away for a week, you put up a temporary 24 no parking sign, tow my car, take the sign down, and charge me £300!!!????
gestapo: yes, its the rule

aarrgghh! so i had no option to get a £30 taxi to get my car and pay £300 for the privilege...unbelievable

Amsterdam

the photo with the King Hotel on is actually where i stayed nearly 8 years ago...probably the tiniest hotel rooms ever (including the japanese capsule hotels!)

Flower market

Outdoor urinal

i kid you not, this is a 'four-man' outdoor urinal in the middle of the street..guess we put this one down to the famous liberal stance of the dutch...or something like that

Amsterdam

had a 6 hour lay-over in amsterdam on the way back from houston, so instead of going insane, i decided to pop into amsterdam city. its actually been nearly 8 years since i was last here, think i came for my 25th birthday with ryan. felt like death mind you, 9 hour flight through the ight and hadnt slept a wink, and amsterdam was cold and grey and wet, but was lovely to be there again...beautiful place, despite 'brits abroad' trying hard to spoil it

Houston

Last minute to Houston for a week as my boss is leaving and i am taking over the role of global head of department in the interim, so had to go and spend some time with him before he left. As usual, didnt get to see much of the city, but was a good week regardless.

One point of note, was that on the night before i left Oslo (i had a 6am flight), the clocks went forward...i had obviously missed this as all the news was in Norwegian. Luckily, i was staying in a hotel at the airport...however, the blind panic when i woke up thinking i had plenty of time for breakfast etc...and realised that the flight left oslo in 45 minutes!! ... i kid you not, i actually went from being in bed to actualy sat in my seat in the plane in 32 minutes....seriously, 32 minutes from bed to plane...including checking in baggage, not something i want to experience ever again!